Communists in the Republican and Tea Parties

I hold in my hand a TOP SECRET paper listing the names of 25 Communists, Socialists and Progressives apparently hiding their real identities from the voting public. These major American political figures have told us they were very conservative Republicans but in reality they were on the American left and closer to Karl Marx than Herbert Hoover.

It’s hard to believe but truth is often stranger than fiction.

Never before, in the long history of our Republic has a group so large and so powerful been clearly identified as Secret Communists, Socialists and Progressives.

Druid

 

Many of them are on election ballots and, if elected, the damage they will do to the country is simply monstrous and incalculable.

As you will note the list includes candidates for the Presidency and Vice Presidency, former Presidents, Senators, Congressmen, Media executives as well as corporate honchos.

Refudiator

How did this come about? Obama, the Welfare State, Health Care Reform and the intrusion of Big Government into the halls of Wall Street.

In your heart you know I’m right.

Name, Position, State:

1. Sarah Palin, Alaska, Governor, Vice Presidential candidate. She is quite anxious to refudiate past statements and lead Socialist Agenda.
2. John McCain, Arizona, candidate for President. Our very own Manchurian candidate.
3. Richard Nixon, California, former President. Now it can be told.
4. George W. Bush, Texas, former President and “Sleeper of the Year.”
5. John Boehner, Ohio, Congressman, possible Speaker of the House. Well tanned and ready to head Socialist Party of America.
6. Sharron Angle, Nevada, Senate candidate. A good bet to head the soon-to-be American Secret Police.
7. Rick Scott, Florida, Senate candidate, ex-corporation leader whose company was fined $1.7 billion. Tossed out by Board of Directors. Revenge will be sweet for this commy.
8. Jan Brewer, Arizona, Governor, seeking re-election, hides advocacy of Mexican immigration. Loves Sacco and Vanzetti.
9. Dick Armey, Texas, former House Majority Leader, head of Tea Party “Division”. Ten gallon hat; two gallon thinker aligned with Karl Marx.
10. David Koch, New York, head of Koch Industries, alleged supporter of right-wing causes. Hah!
11. Charles Koch, New York, brother and supporter of David Koch’s attempt to rewrite personal history. Active Communist.
12. Linda McMahon, Connecticut, candidate for Senate, hiding true political views; wrestling with her conscience.
13.  Newt Gingrich, Georgia, ex-speaker of the House. Dumped wives for their right-wing views.
14. Christine O’Donnell. Delaware, perpetual candidate, Druid Party. Only closest associates know she’s Druish.
15. Joe Miller, Alaska, running for Senate. Long-time Obama friend.
16. Tom Coburn, Oklahoma, Senator from The Family. Can’t wait for next May Day rally.
17. John Ensign, Nevada, sharp dresser, acquirer of mistresses. Daddy supplies Checks and Balances. A real sleeper.
18. John Sanford, South Carolina, will run for presidency – of Argentina on Che Guevara ticket.
19. Antonin Scalia, Washington DC, Justice for everybody but Republicans. Nine known children, more in closet? Hates lawyers.
20. Dick Cheney, Wyoming, former Vice President, former Republican, could run for president on Socialist ticket. Too liberal for mainstream.
21. Rush Limbaugh, New York and Palm Beach, has fooled millions into believing he’s on the right. Way left of center.
22. Mitch McConnell, Kentucky, current Senate Minority Leader, if Democrats win will run for Majority Leader – Socialist Ticket. Loves Keynes, Stalin and Putin.
23. Ronald Reagan, California, former president. Soon to be released diaries reveal secret life as LBJ follower. Hated jelly beans, thought Missile Defense was indefensible. Way, way left.
24. Ayn Rand, writer, author of famous novel, Atlas Shrugged It Off. Lefties’ Bible. Previously believed to be conservative. Now we know.
25. Rand Paul, Kentucky, running for Senate. Not to be confused with Libertarian father and Texas Congressman. Dr. Paul is another in the line of right winger secret agents of the Communist Chinese. Views Mao’s Red Book as real Constitution.

Now it’s up to you. Are you going to stand with these frauds who are attempting to change the America we know and love into something quite different?

Election Day is Tuesday, November 2.

It’s up to YOU!

PS: There are, of course, many others. Republican Pat Toomey of Pennsylvania running for the Senate. Communist. Republican Mark Kirk of Illinois running for Obama’s old seat. Keynesian.

 

On and on.

 

Warren Langer

warren-langer@att.net

Still Liberal at 83

.

Smarter vs. smaller government

The cry of the looniest is for smaller and smaller government. This is exemplified by the T-Bag Movement which constantly rails about the inherent beauty of a smaller government by which they appear to be calling for 27 of them to run Washington which will be promptly (and I mean promptly) renamed Reagan.

OK if you want to go all the way it will be Reagan DR. The District of Reagan will no longer contain any of the alphabet soup agencies of yore but will contain a much smaller Congress quite possibly housed in the Reagan Monument, formerly honoring our initial president.

The Reagan Memorial, the one where some old guy now sits pondering the future of the country without slavery will now feature a horse and rider watching a movie of John Wayne discovering the west.

It’s gratifying to learn my children and grandchildren will someday visit us from Reagan State out in the northwest. I can only hope Reagan Airport runs better in Seattle than it does in Reagan DC.

Our brand new form of government will adopt a few of the finer moments of Hamid Karzai’s Afghanistan. Nominees of the Democratic (I’m an old fashioned Democrat) party will have to be approved by the ruling 27. As they have done in Afghanistan and in Iraq many nominees will be taken off the ballot because….

As a result all will be well in Reaganland, the Home of the Reasonably Free and Plenty of Brave Talk.

As soon as we get the government off our backs we will be able to drill, baby drill and before you know it oil will be seeping our way without the hindrance of oil platforms.

As soon as we get the government off our back we will be able to mine coal without the damn miners asking for this and that. Poor guys can’t see in the dark and we won’t let them burn candles. Crybabies. Bunch of commies.

As soon as we get the government off our backs our individual states will be able to clearly define who is and who is not a valid citizen and won’t it be wonderful to send Them back to Texas which we stole fair and square from Mexico.

As soon as we get the government off our backs we will be able to pass financial reform and allow our major banks to operate without these ridiculous restraints the socialists, communists and fascists in the current administration are always talking about.

As soon as we get the government off our back we will be able to travel down the highways on a horse while we text and phone other freedom loving Americans.

As soon as we get the government off our back.

Another critical timeline in American history.

The Kentucky Derby is up for grabs on Saturday. Observation: never bet against Calumet Farms. A modest piece of whimsy since it no longer exists but won me twelve big ones ($12.00) at college when twelve big ones came in handy for eating purposes. I was at a fraternity beer festival with friends and a few big time Illini athletes who had never heard of Calumet and in this particular year – Ponder. And no I don’t know what this comes to in Euros.

Ultimately the Calumet Farms owner, Warren Wright, died and his heirs turned it into mush. Another cautionary tale of greed.

Calumet produced horses like Whirlaway, Armed, Citation, Coaltown and Alydar. In the end it became another scam like Madoff and Rothstein. Alydar was killed for the insurance or so the story goes.

Note: This is what comes of reading the sports pages since I was seven. Obviously no good can come of this.

 

warren-langer@att.net

Still Liberal at 83